I call it "Pre-exam Symptoms"

I will have 3 Midterm exams and 1 quiz next week but I really don't have mood to do anything today.

I even watched Grey's Anatomy this afternoon.

Hopeless.

I become the main committee for Vibrant Blood.I am quite happy about that but I feel like not very confident in this.Everything seems like very challenging to me.I need more exposure and experience!!!!
This event is like too MASSIVE for me.But it doesn't mean I can't cope with it as I will put in more and more effort into it.

Becoming the Business manager sub-committee is not an easy job too.Looking for sponsorships is getting harder during the economic crisis.

Now,I don't feel like studying and I don't feel prepared for the exams.
EMPTY.
My brain is empty.The gloomy weather reflects my mood.
PATHETIC.

But whoever reading this please don't freak out.

They are just my Pre-exam Symptoms.

Sg and Me

It has been 1 month++ since I last updated my blog.

Actually I have a calculus quiz tomorrow and homework need to be done.
But see what am I doing now?

Blogging and facebook-ing.

Time passes really fast in Singapore.I am not very very very busy here but it is like I still have many things to catch up everyday.

I definitely have less classes here than in INTI( crazy timetable in INTI) but i seriously miss INTI very much.

I have more and more friends in Sg and I am glad for that.I prefer one whole bunch of us hanging around.

I miss the lunch time when few of us would be busy tearing and sharing one single sheet of tissue paper.Even simple things can be so meaningful and memorable.

Now,sometimes I have to eat alone as I have a quite different timetable with others.

I think I am now the lowest 40% in the course and I am really working hard to struggle to the top 25%.That is my aim.

Everyone is so smart and hardworking here.Maybe I need to work harder.

The difference between M'sia ang Sg is that the pace in Sg is really fast.The lectures are conducted much much faster........bla bla bla......

And one more example is that the even the escalators are moving two times faster than the M'sia ones,Singaporean are still running on them.

M'sia's life seems so relaxing to me.

I am getting used to it.Is a good sign but it does not mean that I will like this place anyway.

Anyway,hope my friends are doing fine too.

Lets study hard and play harder....Wahaha.

Leaving in a rush

Ok...just want to update my status with you all.

First,I am not longer working as I quit on last Saturday.Luckily I did that.

Second,I am leaving tomorrow to singapore to start my study in NTU.

It is quite depressing that I even do not have chance to have a farewell with friends.
The timing even does not allow me to go back INTI to claim my official A level certificate.

RUSH

Luckily the accomodation problem was solved in time.

Mentally I think I am not prepared to face the new environment.I have to admit that I am not very good at adapting in new places and communicating with new people who I do not understand.

But I think all those can be overcome.Give me more time for that.

Lets welcome the new challenge into my life with anticipation.I can do it.

My results

So that was it.
2 months of torturing waiting ended when the results popped out on the screen a few seconds after clicking on the "log on" button.

Before clicking,there is a step that must not be skipped when checking results online.What is that?
Covering up the right side of the page with the trembling hand is highly essential to prevent you from fainting regardless of the outcomes.

Of course,I performed these steps according to procedures perfectly except my hands were shaking so vigorously that I could hardly move the pointer to the "log on" button.

Enough for the nonsense.

Finally I knew my results.My dad said "Not surprise".OK.I would not want to comment on that.
To me,it is just the first step for everything.

It is just the beginning.Another waiting with anticipation had begun after the receipt of results.
But the truth is a '4As' does not guarantee an acceptance by NTU or a permission in changing programme.


There are too many uncertainties and contingencies.
So,I ll be patient.

Counting down

5
4
3
2
1


Today is Thursday
6 August 2009

5 days from now will be Monday
Monday?
Oh...
Working day as usual
But,wait.........................
More eventful than that
That will be the time when A level results are announced

I hate checking the result online
Panick
No choice

I hope all my friends can get good results.
Including myself.

P/s Friends.If you are reading this,doo check the results with me on Monday.
I do not want to be alone in this.
Haha.

Liquid Luck

I had been having a bad luck for the last few days.

The air-conditional system at the 5th floor Hall protested to me who was his new 'Manager'.
The way of showing its smoldering hate towards me was by freezing up itself,forming a layer of ice on the cooling box.
That was my first time in charge of the hall but I did not go on so smoothly.It seemed like I was not so welcomed.
But anyway,I would try to foster a better friendship with the air-conditional system.

Then,the next day.
My first fetching my colleagues out for lunch as a farewell for one of them ended up really hilarious.My car tire was punctured during our way back to school.It felt like sitting in the roller coaster as my car was trembling and struggling its way back.After that,they were the ones to change the spare tire as I was having laboratory class immediately.We had a good laugh about what happened.

But on the other hand,I think I am quite lucky.
At least the compressor did not die down during the event.(It still knew how to'give me face')
At least I reached the school in time for the experiment and my car did not turn upside down during the journey.

I do not need actual liquid luck.I just need to feel lucky.
All of us should.Feeling yourselves being pathetic will only make your lives more gloomy than it already does.
Stay LUCKY!!

New lifestyle

My life after A level in INTI has totally changed.

No more piles of books and notes.(I am lazy enough to leave all those behind)

My daily routines run almost the same everyday,occupied by two most important components which are work and family.

Reluctantly,I open my eyes at 6.00 a.m. in the morning on my bed and drag my feet out from the air-conditioned room.

Everyday,I start working from 7.30 a.m. until 4.30 p.m.

Do I like this job?I think it is still acceptable.It is quite free sometimes.Guess what?I can online during work.(Shh......)So what I do when I am boring are to play facebook and surf blindly on the web.

My major task is to prepare the apparatus and chemical required for the experiments which are on the afternoon.So,I hate days without experiments as I will end up nothing to do at all for one whole day.

Normally,I will go to visit my grandmother at healthcare centre after work.I bet many do not know what I am talking about.She is suffering from lung cancer.Last stage.I do not mention to most of my friends because I think it is not neccesary.Being at the last stage and at her age mean that she cannot undergo any surgery.Operation is just too dangerous.Actually I accept this news calmly as I understand that as people age,they become more vulnerable to succumb to diseases.Visiting her is not an obligation but something I want to do.

But the next thing is definitely in the other way which is fetching my sister back from tuition or school.That will be the time to listen to blasting musics and read novels in the car.But this task can turn out to be irritating and tiring when she is late.
So,it will be about 5.30 p.m. when I reach home.Quite tiring.Then,even I am not a good cook,I will offer my help to cook the dinner because I want to settle everything before I go to bathe.
Haha..So,imagine that.Quite tiring.

After that,I will take in clothes hanging outside.It will be my job to fold them neatly after dinner while watching TV.

That is the reason that I seldom go out with friends as I am usually exhausted.I go to bed much earlier than before.I even fall asleep when watching TV.(except when I am watching Prison Break)

Am I satisfied with my life?I will put a question mark for that.How about I let you to help me answering that?

Sometimes I will take the time in between to take a walk in Kluang mall.Nothing to buy or look for but just to relax.

So,today I decide to go swimming as I have not had any exercise recently.But I wonder whether I will have the energy and mood to go after work.

Miss INTI life anyway.

The Story of Edgar Sawtelle

Have you ever tried to scream your heart out but there is no voice coming out from your dried up throat?

No even a single sound.It is all silent.

I think most of you do not have this experience.

I did.But it was in my dreams.It had happened for several times in my dreams.After all,they were just nightmares.

I am reading an english novel,entitled The Story of Edgar Sawtelle.(It is the name of the main character)

He was a mute who could hear normally,unlike other cases where people would be both deaf and mute.

He could not even cry out a voice.It started when he was born but it was not inherited.

I have not finished reading.I have not even reached half of the book.

But there is a part that leads me sinking into deep thought.

Before I tell the piece,lets give you some introduction.

The family was staying in a house far away from other villages,truely isolated from others and no even a house in the sight of view.The family's job was to breed and train dogs.

One day,when they were carrying out their daily routines,the boy suddenly found his father lying on the floor downstairs.His mother was in town and no one was around except litters of dogs.

He rushed to his father and held him.His father's heartbeats became weaker and weaker until he could not feel it.The breathing subsided.

He reached out to the phone,dialed to the operator.But he could not talk,not even a word out of his mouth.He tried but in vain.

Only pieces of "A....na.......".Desperated.He was so helpless and felt himself being so useless.

Kneeling down on the ground,his tears rolled down.

He beat the phone on the counter till it formed pieces and the receiver left hanging in the air.

Nothing else he could do but to wait for someone to pass by but the chance was so rare.

His father died.

I can imagine how painful it was.Looking at the life of someone close slipped away.

Anyway,what I want to say is to be grateful of what we own.We are healthy and strong.Sometimes we take things for granted.Blinded by wealth and power,we blame our lives while we are more lucky than others.

I will tell the overall story when I am done reading.But eventhough I have not,I can make an early conclusion that it is a very good novel.

Sick

How am I?

Not so good(I think) but I am still alive and breathing.I have been having flu since a few days ago.It hasn't recovered till today.Then on Sunday,during CHHS sports day,I was stung by an unknown insect,causing my right hand to swell.My skin turns reddish due to inflammation.What makes things worse is that since yesterday I have been coughing non-stop.

No choice but to consult the doctor yesterday.Luckily the swell ceased so I could escape from getting an injection.But consuming medicines gave rise to another problem,they make me feel sleepy and dizzy.So,again,I slept for about 12 hours yesterday.

It definitely does not feel good to be sick.I still have to work today.What I afraid the most is not my condition but the possibility of spreading my viruses to others.(That is why I don't want to talk if possible)

I,myself hope I will recover soon.It doesn't feel comfortable at all to be ill.So,friends do take care of yourselves.

Time-traveler

It had been at least one and half years since I finished my secondary education in SJM.

Hi,guys.Remember this?This is 5Sc1

Time flies and people change.I have changed.

Hehe..Miss these?I do.We were so young. But now...

Studying in SJM mould my personalities which are further shaped in my INTI life.



Hehe..nice melaka and cameron trip..My inti gang!!

My stories about Rural Camp will take more than 2 full pages to tell...So,I will simplify them to I LOVE RC!!

But sometimes I wonder,who would I become and how would I change if I decided to stay for Form 6?(Ignore me,it is just crazy thought)

I love my life in secondary school where I have built up my friendships.

I miss my life in INTI.I explored more in INTI than in secondary school where I learnt ways to get in touch with people?(people with different characteristics)And how important is tolerate among friends.

Do allow me to ponder over these moments because I always hope I can time-travel back.(another crazy thought)

I won't change anything in the past.I just want to be there again.

Recently ^@^

I have been working recently but only for another one month or perhaps two.I think working is better than do nothing at home.How is my life after A level?I think is not bad but I don't go out with my Kluang gang as frequent as I have thought.It is because everyone is busy with their studies which I think is normal as STPM is really not that easy.

Stress will build up day by day as the exam period is approaching.Haha..I am just talking about my experience.I think A level is not that tough compared to STPM because at least we have our syllabi/syllabuses(i have checked before,both are acceptable) and exams separated into two parts.But you will find that life when you struggle hard with your gang memorable after you finish the exams.

I think I am quite confident about that.I miss INTI life.I bet my friends do miss the life too.During the exam periods,all our lives were about tons of BOOKS and NOTES.The high stress atmosphere could be suffocating and terrifying.But some parts of that life were enjoyable because we shared problems and we solved problems together.
So,to my Kluang Form 6 friends,hope you do enjoy your lives.Wahaha..though you may not feel the lives being INTERESTING now.

My results are going to be out on 10 August.I have to check my results online which I hate so much(especially without my A level gang around me).Then maybe one or two weeks after that I will go back INTI to take my official results slip.I think that will be the time when my A level life officially ends(I hope I don't have to resit..pray hard..)

I have to apologise to my 8th RC members for not able to attend the gathering because I have to work.I think it does not sound reasonable if I apply leave as I only work for such a short period.I thought I can go back quite often but it turned out to be impractical.But I will definitely go back someday.Haha..

Headache

It really did give me a headache..

I know we need to discuss about my further education but there is the time when fights always arise.It is because my parents and I have our own ways of viewing things.I don't blame them for how they think 'who-i-am' but I just hope they can understand me more.Yes,I am clumsy,I am forgetful,I am.........I have a lot of weaknesses that do not qualify myself to study medicine(which they think is too heavy for me)or chemistry(bacause of my carelessness)or to study abroad(they think I am not alert so it is not safe).Haiz....Foremostly, I really do hate the idea of commenting me as the-one-only-know-how-to-study and nothing else.Hey..that is just from your point of view.But is that the truth?I wonder.

They think I push myself too hard and being too 'kiasu'.Yes,I am a very competitive person.But it is also a strength.I struggled hard because I want to keep improving.I have dreams.

I put the university things aside till i finished my A level.I think I need to think twice before I really decide what I want in my life and before I talk to you.
I did my 'homework'-surfing for information about universities and courses,trying to find the cheapest medical school I can get.But at the end,I am still frustrated.Singapore or others.I don't want you to think I am simply asking to study in any universities without knowing the fees and all that.I know all that.

To you,a simple life will be good enough.Study is just a part of life.It does not guarantee anything.You always think I don't understand that.Guess what,I know!My mum said maybe 20 years later I will regret about leaving so far from home and not being able to stay near the family.Guess what,I know.But that is the way I will think when I am 40.
Is it really necessary to think like that when I am 19?I may make mistakes in my life,choosing the wrong path and regret it later.But so what?That is life.

A life with fault will be more perfect to me.Sometime I just hope what I get are not only denial,telling me what I think are wrong.

My first blog in my life

I always feel jealous when viewing others' blogs.Looking at how they write to express themselves.But I have never brought myself to write a blog.I wanted to but maybe laziness had been an excuse.I have to admit that all my languages suck.

Now,I just have one simple reason for writing a blog.To let others know how my life is progressing though we are distantly apart from each other.

You will not know what will happen next in your lives,so how about take the risks?

Neverland.It is the place where Peter Pan and his friends live.It is a dreamland where I always want to be..escape from the reality..and never grow up..

I know it sounds childish.But,do allow me to be a little myself here and to be different from who I am in reality.

I hope my blog will become a channel for my friends to understand me more and keep in touch with me (besides facebook)Haha....
Feel free to comment on my blog.(I think my grammar mistakes are countless)